4 MORE WEEKS!

I apoligize in advance.....this is going to be a rambling unorganized post! The last few weeks have been an emotional roller coaster for me. My son Darin has been serving an LDS mission for the past two years and will be home in exactly 4 weeks. In a way it was the slowest fastest two years of my life! I remember dropping him off at the airport as if it was yesterday watching him walk through security and turning to me for that one last wave goodbye. At the same time it feels like an eternity ago! Words can't exactly express my gratitude to my Father in Heaven for entrusting me to raise my son. This past week I have been looking back through pictures of the little guy that was my buddy!! We were truly inseparable until it wasn't exactly cool to have his mom tagging around, although I would have if he would have let me!! I have great memories of the countless books we read together each night, how he used to make me sing the same songs over and over to him every single night as I lay beside him in bed trying to get him to sleep. Sneaking out of the room trying not to wake him  up when he finally did. Our daily walks at UTPB and jumping into the pool after each morning. Walking all over Guadalajara and taking him to watch the tortilla man on the corner while drinking soda our of a bag! haha  Cooking with him in the kitchen and playing board games as a family. The proud mom moments of watching him pitch, making the all star team for baseball, hearing him play the violin, making the honor roll, being the star student in grade school, being the top AR reader and watching him achieve his goals and becoming an Eagle scout.  The memories are just too many to tell. Things weren't always easy for Darin. We moved around a lot which can be hard on children but Darin had a knack for choosing good friends and adapting to new places. I am sure this contributed to him being able to adapt so quickly on his mission to a new country and culture.

 As I have read his weekly emails from Honduras, I have been able to see how his life experiences have helped him on his mission. I have also been able to see how much he has grown mentally and spiritually. It is almost measurable. His letter home today was so touching and had me in tears. Although we realize as parents that our children will never truly understand how much we sacrifice for their well being, we hope that they will at least someday appreciate a few things along the way!  Every important decision I have ever made in my life has been with my childrens well being first in mind. When Darin was younger, he was very tender-hearted and so grateful for all he had. Even though it wasn't much, to him it was enough. I remember one birthday, his Grandpa Bradshaw came and he told Darin that he had a gift for him for his birthday. He then handed Darin a box of hot tamales expecting Darin to complain about the small gift or to see it as the joke it was intended to be. Instead Darin looked his Grandpa straight in the eyes and thanked him for getting him a gift. His Grandpa was supersized at Darins response and turned to me and said, "Never let him lose that tender humble heart". I don't think that was something that was taught to him, he was born with that tender spirit.

When David and I got divorced, Darin really struggled. I worried so much about him and tried so hard to be strong and to be there for him. I tried my hardest not to let him see my personal suffering or to see how broken I was feeling. As he was trying to sort out what in the world was happening to our family, he lost a bit of his spirit. I could see it. I have never prayed so hard. When I read Darins letter today, I could see that I have the old Darin back but even better. His tender heart and  grateful spirit shone through his email and touched my heart. He is truly filled with the spirit of Christ as I think all missionaries are. 

I have a strong testimony of missionary work. There is no better place for a young man to be then calling people to repentance and bringing souls unto Christ, if they are able to serve. It has been amazing to be a part of the missionary mom "community" and to hear and share experiences of our children who serve all over the world. It is a mighty work that the world needs to hear. The world needs to know one simple message more now than ever. That message is that each person on this earth is a child of the same God. He is the one and only God for all who have ever walked the earth. He loves us more than we can understand. He wants us to be tried and tested and to grow while here on this earth so that we can become all that we can in the life to come with our families. He sent us here to learn not only happiness and joy but also sorrow and pain. What an honor it must be to Darin to be able to see lives change when they find out who they really are and where they came from. Darin challenged me at the beginning of summer to re-read the Book of Mormon before he gets home. As I read the last few versus my soul burned with a strong witness of its truthfulness. It was a witness that I needed to feel at this time in my life. I am so grateful for my Savior. For his sacrifice for me personally. He is the only one who will every truly understand the pain and joy we feel in this life. He is one of the only people that I personally can count on as I travel the road of life. I was especially touched today by the words of a missionary who sent an email to his mom today his words were, " I love the last few verses of the Book of Mormon spoken by the prophet Moroni and this would be my final invitaion to all.....

32 Yea, come unto Christ, and be perfected in him, and deny yourselves of all ungodliness; and if ye shall deny yourselves of all ungodliness, and love God with all your might, mind and strength, then is his grace sufficient for you, that by his grace ye may be perfect in Christ; and if by the grace of God ye are perfect in Christ, ye can in nowise deny the power of God.

33 And again, if ye by the grace of God are perfect in Christ, and deny not his power, then are ye sanctified in Christ by the grace of God, through the shedding of the blood of Christ, which is in the covenant of the Father unto the remission of your sins, that ye become holy, without spot."

I know that this is true. I know that Christ can cleanse us of all our sins. I invite all to test it, to know for yourself of his love and truth.

I am truly counting my blessing tonight and all that I have been given. I am the luckiest woman around!